How to Release Chronic Tension when it is Caused by Anger

How to Release Chronic Tension when it is Caused by Anger

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Do you feel tense and achy in your body from holding in anger? See if any of these tips appeal to you to safely release stuck anger and allow your body to relax again.

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How to Wake Up a "Soggy Brain"

How to Wake Up a "Soggy Brain"

What do you do when you feel fully stuck and realize you’re spending too much time on social media or wandering down some other rabbit hole? It’s time to switch gears entirely!

Photo by eberhard grossgasteiger on Unsplash

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Tips and Tools for At-Home Pain Relief

Tips and Tools for At-Home Pain Relief

Getting a massage right when you need it most isn’t always possible. So what do you do when you’re in pain, stretching isn’t enough and you can’t get in for a massage right away?

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Deep Tissue Massage - What exactly does that mean and does it have to hurt?

Deep Tissue Massage - What exactly does that mean and does it have to hurt?

Deep Tissue Massage is important and beneficial for treating chronic pain from chronic tension in the soft tissues. But it should not hurt and can even be quite relaxing as you feel your tight muscles release long-held tension.

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Breathwork to Help Alleviate Stress, Anxiety and Restore Balance

Breathwork to Help Alleviate Stress, Anxiety and Restore Balance

Breathing is a simple act we do throughout the day, mostly unintentionally. But with conscious breathing, we can really change how we feel in each moment and cope with stressful situations much more easily.

Photo by Le Minh Phuong on Unsplash

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Practice Self-Compassion When You Need to Rest

 Photo by  Giulia Bertelli  on  Unsplash
Compassion for Others begins with Kindness to Ourselves.
— Pema Chodron

Setting this goal of writing one blog post per week was a big deal for me. I put it off for a long time for many reasons, including that I knew a week like this one would come - I'm tired, mentally and physically. I have no bandwidth for focusing or critical thinking. Researching and composing an engaging post feels REALLY hard right now. Too hard.

I'm not even stressed - I'm exhausted from all good things. Today I returned from a quick trip to Lake Chelan with my parents who are in town. It was great; a fun and relaxing mini-vacation. But I'm depleted from all the driving and time outdoors in the hot and super smoky air. And like anyone with messy old kitties, I spent a lot of time and energy deep-cleaning my house prior to my parents' arrival. I knew I'd be tired from a busy weekend, but thought I could still cover the blog post topic I'd planned.

But, I was wrong. The usual energy boost methods aren't enough so I'm spending my time instead recharging my batteries with the methods that work for me: taking naps, doing yoga, eating well, playing in my garden, moving mindfully. More importantly than writing a content-rich post, I want to be rested and fully present for working hands-on with clients this week. So I've decided to go easier on myself today; to be Self-Compassionate and honor my mind and body's need for rest. 

In the past I would have taken the road of Self-Criticism, telling myself all of the ways in which I could have better prepared for this week and beating myself up for not writing the post in advance. Or I may have listened to my Inner Critic saying "you'll never complete this goal so just give up now." But neither of those voices actually serves me in a healthy way. And after practicing enough Self-Compassion, I've learned how to recognize the Inner Critic voices and not to listen to them anymore. 

Self-Compassion is not a way of judging ourselves positively. Self-Compassion is a way of relating to ourselves kindly... embracing ourselves, flaws and all.
— Kristin Neff

The interesting part of this Self-Compassion moment, is that when I let myself "off the hook" for the topic I'd planned, I realized that I could share this as a topic. It requires less of my energy to relate my current experience. So ironically, by allowing myself to not meet my weekly goal, I found the inspiration to still achieve it! And I'm acknowledging the feeling that this is just a "filler" blog post and that it is also okay. 

Sometimes we have to rest and "do less" than what we planned in order to have energy to do more in the future. The next time your inner critic starts speaking loudly when you're too tired to do something well, check in with your voice of Self-Compassion. If you need help finding that voice, try this guided meditation by one of my favorite teachers, Tara Brach. Remember to start small and practice daily. Like any unfamiliar habit, it takes time and repetition to learn to be kind to ourselves

Contrast Therapy- At-Home Treatment for Foot Pain

 Photo by  Xavier Foucrier  on  Unsplash

Should you use heat or ice for pain? There are multiple opinions on which method is best to use and for what ailment, but unfortunately there isn't a whole lot of data to indicate what is actually the best treatment.

My suggestion is to do what works best for you. If icing for 15 minutes just feels awful, don't do it. If you feel worse after applying a heat pack for 10-20 minutes, it's not helping you. Choose the method that provides relief during the 10-20 minute application and also leaves you feeling better an hour or more later.

My preferred application is a combination of heat and ice, called Contrast Therapy. In this method you create a vascular flush by alternating cold to constrict the vessels and remove inflammation, and heat to dilate the vessels to increase blood flow and relax muscle tissue. This is an effective at-home treatment for many common foot complaints, including:

  • Plantar Fascitis
  • Heel Spurs
  • Tendonitis
  • Sesamoiditis
  • Foot Cramps
  • Stiff Joints
  • Achiness from Over-Use
  • Post Injury or Surgery Inflammation (talk to health care provider about appropriate time to begin)

The Foot Soak Method:

1. Set up two containers that are large enough to fit your feet. These could be large bowls, dishtubs, or even large ziplock baggies (caution- spillage risk!).

2. Fill one container with hot tap water (max 110 degrees so you don't burn yourself). For increase therapeutic benefit, add a cup of epsom salts. Fill just enough so that the water reaches over your ankle when fully submerged. 

3. Fill the other with cold tap water adding ice if you want to make it colder. Make sure both tubs are tolerable.

4. Before starting your soak, grab a towel to dry your feet when you are done. Alternate soaking your feet in each tub according to the schedule that fits best for you:

For tension or stiffness, alternate 3 minutes hot, 1 minute cold for 15 -20 minutes. End with cold.

For inflammation or pain, alternate 3 minutes cold, 1 minute hot for 15-20 minutes. End with cold.

These times are general guidelines and can be adjusted as needed. Again, do what feels and works best for you.

If doing this method for a full 20 minutes, you may want to add more hot water or ice during the soak. But even a temperature difference of 20 degrees is enough to create the desired effect. 

Additional Contrast Therapy Methods:

The method above can also be used for hands, wrists, forearms & elbows. 

If you want to use contrast therapy on a body area where you can't to do a full soak, you can apply the same method using hot and ice packs. This can be as simple as filling gallon zip-lock baggies with hot water and ice water. Be sure to protect your skin using a thin towel wrapped around each pack.

Safety Precautions:

Contrast Hydrotherapy isn't appropriate for everyone. If you are uncertain whether this is safe for you or are generally supposed to avoid applying heat, ice or have a heart condition, please consult your doctor before trying this method.

Massage Isn't an "Instant Fix" - Setting Realistic Expectations for Your Healing Process

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When I attend social events and people learn I'm a massage therapist, they often like to tell me about their personal experiences with massage, good and bad. Two common expectations I hear regarding massage are:

1. I didn't feel better immediately after the massage so it didn't work, and

2. An hour of massage didn't fully resolve my issue so it wasn't helpful.

Those are pretty high expectations to have of both your body's healing ability, and of the massage therapist (spoiler alert- we're HUMAN!) Focusing on two common complaints- headaches and back pain- here are some analogies I use to respond to the above expectations.

Reviving a Wilted Plant

If you a water a wilted plant, how long does it take until it is fully healthy and vibrant again? Maybe it's only 1 day because it just needed a bit of water and hasn't been wilted for long. But what if that plant has been without water for weeks, was chewed on by an animal (thanks, kitty cat), needs a bigger pot and/or different light? It's going to take a lot longer and more care for it to fully bounce back. The body is the same way. Perhaps you will recover from that ongoing headache after just one massage. Or maybe there are more stress factors causing your headache and it will take more sessions to fully resolve.

Starting a New Exercise Program

When you start a new workout plan, how long does it take to notice results? After a couple of workouts, you likely feel better in some way- perhaps more energized or mentally calmer. But it's unrealistic to expect to meet weight or strength goals within just a workout or two. If you're seeking massage treatment for an ongoing issue, expecting it to be resolved in one session is like expecting a 1/2 mile run to prepare you for a 5k after not running for years. 

With a new exercise program it's also common to feel a bit worse initially- more sore, or perhaps exhausted. These are all normal responses for the body with massage as well. The muscle tissue takes a couple days to repair and rebuild in a healthier form after strenuous exercise or treatment massage. Especially after injury, you may feel more sore soon after a massage. (You should not be bruised or in acute pain) But if you feel better within the next day or two than you did before the massage, it is beneficial. 

Finding the Ideal Teacher

Have you ever struggled to learn a new concept but never quite got it until the right person explained it and all of a sudden it made a lot of sense to you? We all learn in different ways and connect with different teachers based on the approach that works best for us. Massage is similar in that you may need to try multiple massage therapists until you find one that works well for you. Every massage therapist has their own style and training, so if you don't like massage based on the few experiences you've had, it may mean you haven't found the right LMT for you yet. (Or maybe you don't like massage and that's OK too!) Find an LMT with whom you feel at ease, look forward to seeing, enjoy the massage, and feel *better* after every session (for at least a few days) because that's the person who knows how to communicate with your tissue. 

Many of my clients notice significant relief from back spasms and headaches within 24-48 hours. But they also know it may take a few sessions to fully resolve because we've had this conversation. The next time you have a relentless headache or unexpected muscle spasm, give your body a few massage sessions to fully heal. If you feel great after just one visit, that's awesome! If not, notice in what ways you do feel *better* and allow yourself at least 2-3 visits before deciding whether massage is helpful. You deserve it! 

* A Note on feeling "Better:"

To "feel better" doesn't mean to feel perfect or how you felt prior to the current pain, injury or ailment you're experiencing. "Better" means noticing an improvement in how you feel. Perhaps you still have that headache, but it's more tolerable because you're breathing more easily and feel calmer. Or maybe your back is still in spasm, but you can move in a greater range of motion with the same or less pain than before the massage. This is the goal I have as a massage therapist- to make a positive change and facilitate improvement in your system as much as I reasonably can within each session.

 

Setting Intentions to Quiet a Busy Mind

 Photo by  Simon Migaj  on  Unsplash

Photo by Simon Migaj on Unsplash

A common frustration I hear from many people is the inability to quiet the "hampster brain." I'm guessing you know that feeling when you just want to relax or go to sleep but your mind starts racing with random thoughts or worries or whatever it thinks you need to focus on instead of being calm. It can also happen when we want to focus or be present but find ourselves easily distracted.

As a solution for the busy brain, Meditation is often suggested as an ongoing daily practice. Personally, I love meditation. But let's be honest, it's not a quick fix! It has profound and positive effects, but it can take time to have a noticeable impact. So while I highly recommend starting a meditation practice (here's my favorite app) if you don't currently have one, I want to offer another short-term solution to quiet that busy little hampster wheel. 

You've likely heard of setting intentions to manifest goals and desires. But intention setting can also be used to help you return to the present moment when your mind starts to wander. During sessions, when clients mention they are struggling to relax and quiet the mind, I invite them to set an intention for the session. This can be just a word or two to help you come back to the present moment. And it works better than just trying to focus on the breath. 

To get you started, here are some common intentions that apply to most people at some time or other. Choose an intention that serves you best in each moment, whether it be for sleep, receiving massage or acupuncture/energy healing, meditation or focusing the mind on the present situation.

TRUST

PATIENCE

COMPASSION

ACCEPTANCE

SELF-LOVE

WORTHY

CONFIDENCE

PRESENCE

GROUNDING

FOCUS

RELAXED

LET GO / RELEASE

RECEIVING

I release ______ (fears, anger, negativity, resistance, etc.)

I am _____(free, whole, deserving, etc.)

This no longer serves me. / I release what no longer serves me.

There is only this moment.

 

Next time you feel distracted by thoughts, take a few breaths and invite yourself to set an intention.

Ask "What do I need in this moment?"

Usually, the first word or short phrase that pops into your head is the most potent intention for that moment. Say it out loud or feel it in your body. Also keep it positive and non-judgmental. Saying "be quiet, brain," probably isn't a helpful intention. ;-)

Trust yourself and focus on the intention. Breathe it in to your whole being. Exhale out the busy thoughts and return to the intention when your mind wanders.

Committing to Your (future) Self

 Photo by  rawpixel  on  Unsplash

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

For years it has been my intention to write regular blog posts. But I've always had more excuses or reasons why "I'll start next week instead," than motivation to do it. I tried to start a few years ago when a colleague of mine was in the midst of her own goal to write a blog post every week for a full year. I thought that sounded great, until reality hit me.

Commit to 52 blog posts? Be held publicly accountable for that goal? No way. Too scary! I can't do it, I don't have that much to say!

By now, if I had set that goal and accomplished it, I'd have that sense of achieving something that feels too big to take on. I've always connected with No Meat Athlete Matt Frazier's belief that a goal needs to be big enough to feel unrealistic in order to really inspire and provide the endurance needed to achieve it.

So I'm committing now to writing a blog post per week for the next year. Eek!.. And yay!

Another approach that has been really helpful lately came from a friend:

What does future me need present me to do in order to make her life easier? I ask myself this whenever I recognize I'm putting off something I know is good for me to do. My 38 year old self wants my 36 year old self to commit to a weekly blog posting now, the same as current me wishes past me had already.

Whenever you find yourself thinking, "I'll do it tomorrow or next week," ask yourself how that affects "future you." I love this idea because it applies both to big goals and sticking to new daily habits. 

For example: How does skipping your daily physical therapy exercises affect you next month or 6 months from now when you've made little or no progress? Sure today you get to use that 20 minutes for something else, but is that really what future you needs?

Try this exercise: picture yourself in the future, maybe just 6 months or perhaps a few years out. How does your future body feel? Are you still having the same chronic pains or have they been healed because of the self-care you started doing now? Are you still feeling stuck in the same ways or are you thriving because of decisions you made now?

Go ahead, try it: Close your eyes, take a few centering breaths and connect with your future self. 

After spending some time thinking about it, hopefully you will have at least one answer to this question: What does your future self need you to do right now in order to make their life better? 

 

8 Things to Consider Before Buying a Massage Gift Certificate.

Do you love massage and want to share the experience with a loved one, but not sure if they'll like a gift certificate?

Massage gift certificates aren't appropriate for everyone so here are some things to consider before you gift a bodywork session.

How do they feel about touch? Perhaps they feel they could benefit from bodywork, but are uncomfortable with the idea of a lot of touch. If they've mentioned wanting to try it but feel hesitant, consider gifting them a session with a practitioner who is able to work within their comfort zone and skilled in multiple modalities. Energy Techniques like Polarity Therapy, Reiki and CranioSacral Therapy can be done with the client fully clothed and the gentle, stationary holds won't overwhelm their system like a Swedish or Deep Tissue massage.

Does the recipient love all massage and/or bodywork? Then they'd probably love a gift certificate! Find out if they have a favorite practitioner or gift them a session with someone you really like. If you live out of their area, use online reviews to find practitioners nearby.

Does he/she have a favorite massage therapist they see regularly? If so, be sure to purchase a certificate from that practitioner. Perhaps gift them a longer session than they normally schedule, or purchase a package of sessions so they can enjoy multiple treatments!

Do they enjoy a particular type of massage? If someone loves Deep Tissue massage, but receives a gift certificate for a practitioner who primarily focuses on gentle techniques and energy balancing, it won't be a great fit. If choosing a practitioner for someone, consider if the person will enjoy that style of massage. Also consider whether he/she would prefer a spa environment or a professional office setting. 

Is he/she looking for a regular massage practitioner or something specific in bodywork but doesn't know where to start or hasn't found the right fit yet? Finding the right massage therapist can take  time. If you know of a practitioner you think they'd love, a gift certificate is a great way to introduce them!

Has he/she never mentioned receiving or enjoying massage? Bodywork isn't enjoyed by all. If you're considering gifting a session to someone, but they haven't mentioned receiving bodywork or an interest in it, a gift certificate may not be the best present. 

What type of session is best? If they really love massage, gifting a longer session of 90 minutes or 2 hours is a lovely way to give them more self-care time. If you're unsure of whether they enjoy massage but still want to gift one, start with a short session of 20-30 minutes- they can always upgrade! Gift a Hot Stone massage if you want to give them deep relaxation, treatment, energy balancing and pampering all in one!

Know your state's gift certificate laws: Different states have different laws about gift certificates expiring or declining in value. In WA state, gift certificates never expire. For this reason, most massage practitioners offer certificates by dollar amount, not session length or type. Many practitioners will also let the purchaser redeem the certificate if the recipient decides not to use it after a certain amount of time has passed.

This list is based on the numerous questions I've answered about massage gift certificates since starting my private practice in 2008. Feel free to ask additional questions or leave a comment below if this was helpful!

7 Creative Ways to Drink More Water Every Day

Water is a vital component in a healthy functional body. The adult human body contains up to 60% water, which is used throughout our body as a transport system for nutrients, to lubricate joints and soft tissues, produce saliva, regulate internal body temperature and to eliminate waste. 

I'm in the habit of advising my clients to drink more water after receiving a massage. Why? Because once we release adhered tissues and restore glide, you want to maintain the ease by providing the lubrication for the tissues to continue gliding and not get "re-stuck", ie. drink more water. Water is also the element of creativity, renewal, flow and emotional balancing.

Most people don't drink enough water on a daily basis and I've heard a lot of people say they just forget to drink water, or don't like it. So, I've suggested some creative ways over the years to encourage people to drink water more regularly. 

Here is a list of ideas that people tend to like and use to stay properly hydrated.

1. Drink a full glass before getting out of bed.  I place a cup of water by my bed at night before going to sleep. It comes in handy if I wake up thirsty in the middle of the night, but usually I end up drinking it first thing when I awake, before I even stand.

2. Flavor the water. Use a slice of lemon, orange, lime or another fruit (I love berries!) to give the water a slight flavor. Mint leaves and cucumber work well too. There are a lot of recipes online for water infusions, including this site with some interesting combos.

3. Get a fun container. Have you noticed you drink more water if it's in a certain glass or mug? I particularly enjoy drinking from mason jars, and notice I drink more when I use one. Maybe a fun reusable straw or cool sports bottle calls your name. If taste is an issue, try glass instead of plastic or metal. If you don't enjoy drinking out of it, chances are you aren't drinking much.

4. Wear your water bottle, seriously!  A lot of people are super busy, on the go and chasing kiddos all day long. Who has time to remember to drink multiple glasses of water then? Get one of those mini-hydration back packs so you can literally drink at any moment (and carry small items easily) while on the playground. This one may seem a bit silly, but it works. 

5. Set a calendar reminder. If you like to have pop-up reminders at work, have one set to a frequency that will help you to remember to drink water. Just don't click "dismiss" without drinking the water.

6. Use a smaller bottle at the office. If you sit at a desk all day, use a smaller glass for your water. This will cause you to get up more frequently to refill the glass, which also means you don't find yourself sitting for 3 hours straight. (yea, you reading this blog, how long has it been since you moved around a bit?) Drinking more water also means you have to get up to use the restroom more frequently. More movement in the day = BONUS!

7. Carry a water bottle everywhere. Even if I'm just running to the grocery store, I bring along my water bottle. Red lights are a great time to hydrate. I even bring an empty lightweight collapsible bottle to places with water fountains (like Sounders games) so I can hydrate at the game and not deal with the bulk in my bag.

How much water to drink?

Different bodies have different needs, but an average rule of thumb is to divide your body weight by 2 and aim for that many ounces of water. Ex: a 180lb person would drink 90oz of water per day. Don't worry if it seems way too much water to drink in a day, just try to drink more than you already do if you know you don't drink enough.

Other reasons/excuses why you can't drink enough water in the day? Post them here and I'll try to find a creative solution for you!

How Often Should I Get Massage?

This is one of the most common questions I hear and it doesn't have a simple answer. Other massage therapists may have a different perspective on this based on their therapeutic approach. My answer is based on the techniques I use and what experience has shown me to be best for my clients.

The frequency of massage really varies based on personal preference and reason for receiving bodywork, so I'll address these individually.

Wellness Massage

If you are healthy and seek massage for general wellness and maintenance rather than treatment, 1-2 times per month is a good rule of thumb. If you are eagerly anticipating your next session more than a few days in advance, you may consider decreasing the time between sessions.

Personal Preference

For some people, once a week is regular. For others, once a year feels right. It's important to listen to your own body and honor what feels right for you whether that is a few times per month or a few times per year. If you find yourself feeling long overdue for a massage, then it has been too long since your last session. If you feel that you'd rather have your massage next week because you don't really need it today (or feel overloaded with other treatments), it may be a good idea to increase time between visits.

Chronic Pain Management

People living with chronic pain benefit from more frequent massage visits. If the pain is constant or occurs daily, weekly massage is a good idea until improvements are lasting more than a week. For example, if you have chronic neck and shoulder pain at a 6 out of 10 pain level from sitting at a computer, and the pain level drops to 2-4 out of 10 for 3-4 days after your massage but increases again by day 5 or 6, weekly is a good frequency. If you feel better for up to two weeks, then every two weeks is a good plan. Generally, you want to receive your next session before the previous level of discomfort recurs.

Many people find that after a few weeks of weekly massage, they are ready to decrease to every two weeks and so on until they are at the frequency they prefer. It is possible to decrease your chronic pain without weekly massage for life; but if you really want weekly massage, go for it!

Acute Injury and Post-Surgery Swelling

If you are experiencing a lot of swelling and pain either from an injury, auto-accident or recent surgery, scheduling 2 sessions per week for the first 2-4 weeks is a good plan. In my practice, we would focus on reducing the swelling through lymphatic facilitation, releasing energy blocks and calming the nervous system. The bodywork approach is very gentle and I usually don't do massage at this stage because it is contraindicated and/or unpleasant to receive.

Is there such a thing as too much massage?

The type of bodywork that I do requires processing time and continues to work after the session ends. It is possible for the body to feel overloaded with too much bodywork, so we want to give enough time between sessions for the body to process new information. I don't usually recommend massage more frequently than once per week for this reason, though there are exceptions.

One exception is the Acute Injury treatment plan listed above. Another exception is if you are coming twice in one week for two different approaches, ie: one session for a nurturing massage and the other for energy balancing. 

In Summary

1. Listen to your body

2. Come before you are desperately in need

3. Schedule weekly to make progress in healing

4. Schedule monthly for maintenance

5. Ask your bodywork therapist if you are still unsure.

Determining massage frequency is really about listening to your body's needs in relation to the treatment received. Sometimes you may need weekly treatments, while at other times you may prefer monthly visits. These are just some general guidelines that I have found to be helpful in deciding on when to schedule the next session for my clients. 

Notes of Gratitude

Creating and completing this new site has been one of the most rewarding and challenging labors of my life. It seems a bit strange to me now that it was so difficult and took me years to do. It was a long road to get past the blocks, fears, frustrations, excuses and the downright refusals to just do it. I didn't know that I could actually enjoy creating a site, but I really had a lot of fun with this challenge once I found my flow. I have a lot of people to thank for helping me get to this point, so I'd like to write each a note of gratitude.

A great big THANK YOU to:

Caley Philipps, my coach- who helped me recognize, understand and remove my blocks. You have a real talent and you got me back in the flow! This blog happened because of you.

Becky Pezely, my logo designer- for creating this gorgeous logo that has inspired me to redesign my brand and reveal my authentic self. I didn't even know logo design could be a therapeutic process!

Jon, my office neighbor- for introducing me to Squarespace when I was frustrated with Wordpress so that I could create the site I envisioned and had fun doing it!

Jill Chatterjee, my sister-friend and photographer- For creating most of the images used on my site and encouraging me to get this going!

My amazing team of healers: Mindee Anderson, Kate Bromley, Michelle Wilson, Janel Fox, Mike Hamm, Kathy Jakielski, Robert Lester, Drew Perdichizzi- for your therapeutic touch and healing presence to help me fully integrate and THRIVE.

My family and friends- for your initial feedback on my site and all your continued support through my healing process these past few months.

And my final note of gratitude, but definitely not least, to my partner Michael- I'm immensely grateful for your incredible feedback during the site creation and for the time you invested in helping me. Your constant support, love and encouragement made this entire process much more manageable.